Place the lettuces in a large bowl.
In a large shaker or clean jam jar with a lid, shake together the oil, vinegar, mustard and sugar. Pour over the lettuces and toss together.
Boil your water ready for the poached eggs. Divide the salad between the plates.
Meanwhile, fry the lardons over medium heat until they are crispy. Drain, set aside and keep warm.
Ask everyone to come and sit down at the table. You want the eggs to be hot when people eat the salad. When everyone is seated, poach the eggs. Top each plate of salad with a poached egg. Sprinkle with the bacon lardons and serve immediately. Encourage people to break the poached eggs open so the egg can bathe the salad in gorgeousness. Wait for everyone to take a bite, and for the quizzical expressions on their faces to turn to joyful amazement. It won’t take long.